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Now, I have to repeat some of the ideas I tried to express
earlier on the preceding two occasions, that the concept of ‘within’ has
to be clear to our minds. We are accustomed to think of ‘within’ buildings,
within houses, within temples, within halls, etc., but the ‘within-ness’ of
this Self, or the Atman, is not to be understood in this manner. This
is a difficulty which will face anyone and everyone, one day or the other,
in the pursuit of the meditational career. We as human beings, accustomed
to think in terms of within-ness physically through enclosures of walls,
etc., cannot but think of the Atman also as something within the body
of this person. We touch our physical heart, chest,—”here, within
me, is the Atman.” We cannot but think like this. The within-ness
of the Atman is as difficult to understand as the universality of Brahman.
I pointed out in meagre words that the all-comprehensive character of the
Absolute, or the Ultimate Being, is not to be equated with spread-out-ness
in space, or a lengthened duration of time, that it is durationless eternity
and spaceless expanse. In a similar manner we have to be cautious in understanding
what this within-ness of the Atman is. It is a word, again, having
a logical significance, rather than a spatial connotation. Why is it so?
The word Atman, which is translated often as the Self, implies the
non-objective character of Brahman. It is consciousness, as was pointed
out. Consciousness cannot become an object of someone’s awareness.
Consciousness cannot be known by somebody else. Consciousness knows things
but it itself cannot be known by somebody else; because, if that somebody
is to be there as the knower of consciousness, then consciousness would not
be consciousness, it would be an object, it would be limited. Objects are
always limited because they are bifurcated from the location of the knower.
They are distinguished from the percipient. But consciousness cannot be divided,
because the concept or notion of division implies the presence of consciousness
even in that divided or bifurcated space. Hence, consciousness cannot become
an object. Now, inasmuch as consciousness is Brahman, the Absolute,
and therefore cannot be an object, and inasmuch as also it is the Self, the Atman,
of everyone, it cannot be the known, it has to be the knower. The
within-ness of the Atman, or the Self, indicates only this much, that
it cannot be known through any means of knowledge. There are no means known
or available by which the Atman can be known. Nobody can know the Atman,
nobody can know Brahman, because, if these are to be known, there
must be somebody to know, other than Brahman and the Atman.
Since it is impossible to even imagine anything outside Brahman or
the Atman, there cannot be a knower of Brahman or the Atman.
Then, what do we mean when we say that we seek the realisation of the Self,
realisation of God, Brahman, the Absolute? How is it possible to know,
realise, experience, be in union with Brahman, or the Atman,
if it is not possible to know It through any means available?
Yes, it is not possible to know the Atman through
any available, known, empirical means of perception. Not by perception, not
by inference, not by any known logical process of knowledge can It be contacted
or experienced; because all logic is an externalisation of the knowledge
process. And, as this Brahman, this Atman, which is identified
with consciousness, cannot be an object, It cannot also be an object of logical
understanding. And all our knowledge happens to be logical; therefore, nothing
with which we are acquainted in this world can be considered as adequate
to the purpose. This also sums up the situation of modern learning as an
inadequate means of the knowledge of Reality. Then, how do you know this
great Being? What actually is meant by knowledge of God, Brahman, Atman?
It is not someone knowing Brahman, someone knowing the Atman.
This has become clear because there cannot be someone outside It. Now, are
we, seated here in this hall, a part of It, outside It, inside It, or where
are we? These questions also should not arise. We cannot say that we are
part of It, because It is partless. We cannot say we are outside It, as outside
It nothing can be. We cannot say that we are inside It, for It has no such
thing as inside in a spatial or temporal sense. What is our relationship
with It? There cannot be any relationship. We have now found ourselves in
a particular position, where we seem to be requiring a new system of education
by which the unknowable can be known, by means which are not available anywhere
in the world. Contactless contact is contact with God, says the great Acharya
Gaudapada, the Grand-Guru of Acharya Sankara, in one of his passages. He
says that even Yogis are frightened to hear all these things, what to talk
of other people. We get frightened as children are frightened in a place
where they can see nothing. This is an analogy that is given herein. If you
see a baby crying in a place where nothing is outside it, you will know that
it is crying merely because of the fact that there is nothing outside it.
It is not frightened by the presence of anything; it is frightened by the
absence of things! So, the consciousness of the seeker is frightened and
taken aback by the possibility of there being nothing outside it. While it
is understandable that we can be frightened with things outside, it is ununderstandable
as to how we can be frightened by an absence of things. The reason is the
togetherness of our consciousness with temporality and process. We are so
much tied down to empirical process and hectic activity through transient
methods of living that we cannot understand what the ultimate existence is.
Why was Arjuna frightened at the vision of the Almighty? Arjuna represents
anyone of us, the Jiva, the individual seeking knowledge, experience
and contact of the Reality. But it wants to contact the Reality without losing ‘itself’.
The difficulty arises here, and here is the crux of the whole matter. The
fright or the fear that is referred to by the great Acharya, or that which
we can see even in Arjuna as we have it in the eleventh chapter of the Bhagavad-
Gita, is consequent upon a subtle insecurity felt before the Almighty-Inclusiveness;
insecurity because ‘I am perhaps not to be in His presence.’ It
has to be, and I cannot be. If That has to be, I cannot be, and why should
I not be? All love is love of the Self, finally. The fear of death is the greatest
fear and the love of one’s own life is the greatest of loves. We struggle
hard, sweat through the brow, only to exist in this body. Not to lose this
body, lose this individuality, lose this ego, lose this personality, is the
last thing we can conceive. And Arjuna’s fright is nothing but the fright
of the salt doll in the presence of the mighty ocean which it is trying to
enter. It may melt, it will not come back. The impossibility to come back,
again, is a fear. We want to travel, not that we may not return, but that we
may see a thing and then come back. So, we are tourists even to God. This concept
of going and coming, having an experience and then being what we were once
again, is the malady of human thought. Impurity of the mind is the cause behind
these difficulties and fears.
The knowledge of Brahman, or the Atman, is
not the knowledge of Brahman, or the Atman, by ‘someone
else’. It is the knowledge of the Self only. Says Arjuna here: “Lord,
You know Yourself through Yourself, only. Nobody else can know You.” For,
that somebody who is trying to know God is inside God. The difficulty will
not leave us still. Where are we, then! Though it has been explained, the
question should not arise for reasons that should be clear. If He is to know
Himself and nobody else can know Him, where, are we? Such question should
not arise because this has already been answered when it was said that He ‘is,’ and
that ‘is’-ness is inclusive of every other existence, including
our existence, mine, yours. His knowledge of Himself is not to be confused
with any kind of separatist knowledge distinguished from our knowledge of
That. Hence, we can very well imagine why the means of knowledge available
in this world are not sufficient here. All available means of knowledge in
this world are knowledge pertaining to that which knowledge itself is not.
When you know a tree, the tree is not the knowledge of the tree. knowledge
is the process of knowing, coming in contact in perception; the tree itself
is outside the process. But, here, the object of knowledge is not outside
the process and, therefore, processes of knowledge are inadequate for the
purpose of contacting God. What are the means? The Self is the means, and
when we say the Self, we mean the logical inwardness of that which is all-comprehensive.
This knowledge of That is by That only, which includes us all. It is to be
attained by the melting down of all extrovert impulses of consciousness imagined
in space and time. This is called self-control. This is self-restraint, this
is Tapas. Only a person endowed with Tapas can afford to tread
the path of God. A person who cannot perform Tapas, this austerity,
cannot touch the fringe of this problem.
What is Tapas? We have curious notions of it, again,
but it is principally a Tapas of consciousness. We have no problems
from the physical body or the physical world outside, though sometimes we
imagine that these are the sources of our problems. The problem arises from
an erroneous movement of consciousness. As there can be problems in the world
of dream, we can manufacture a problem by the movement of consciousness as
in dream, in a fashion which is not natural. We are in a waking condition
now, our consciousness is free from the object of dream perception, and,
therefore, objects of dream perception will not anymore bother us. But they
certainly bother us when consciousness enters into that peculiar manufactured
condition within its own self, called dream, and things which are not there
are seen to be there, and this, in one sentence, is the problem of consciousness—the
pursuit of that which is really not there, as if it is the only thing that
is there! When we are confronting solid objects, living beings in dream,
we are honestly seeing them, perceiving them, contacting them and reacting
to them, not as if we are in dream, but as one hundred percent in reality.
There was a thorough mistake of consciousness in imagining that there were
objects in dream, that it had to contact them, evaluate them, and react to
them. The engagement of consciousness in contacting things which are really
not there is the cause of dream; otherwise it would be awake. A similar thing
is happening to us in the so-called waking state. The objects that we see
before us are really not there. They are not there because they have been
placed in this context of objectivity before a perceiving consciousness in
the same way as consciousness places objects in front of it for contact in
the dream world. The analogy of Tapas may be made more clear from
the instance of what our duty would be in dream in order that we may wake
up into the reality of the consciousness of the world. The consciousness
that is engaged in the perception of objects in dream has to be educated
into the conviction that these objects are not there and therefore there
is no point in even thinking of them. Then this is Tapas. The consciousness
has redeemed itself from apparent objects of perception and centred itself
in itself. This centering of consciousness in itself is waking and the adoration
of it as if it is outside is dream. Yoga is only this much. It is the pulling
of consciousness from apparent objects of what we call the world of sense-perception
today, and Tapas need not necessarily mean torture of the body. It
is an education rather than a punishment. It is an evolution organically
rather than any kind of imprisonment of consciousness into beliefs and convictions
to which it is not accustomed. The great admonition of the Bhagavadgita,
here, is very pertinent. Yoga, religion, spiritual practice, or the pursuit
of the path of God, is a healthy, living movement in eternity rather than
in time. It is a growing process organically, and, there should be no pain
for a child to grow into an adult, as it is totally natural, even imperceptible.
The movement to God is like the movement of a baby to the condition of an
adult. The baby does not move by vehicles or by walking with its feet; it
is an organic growth from a lesser completion to a wider inclusive completion.
Even so, God-Realisation is not a movement to some place. It is neither movement
outside nor movement inside. When a child becomes an aged individual, it
has not moved outside, it has not moved inside, it is in itself only, yet
its dimension has increased, it has become organically more inclusive, and
its awareness has become more complete. The way to God-Realisation is an
increase in our logical dimension, in our capacity to know, rather than doing
something, running here and there,—nothing of the kind is spirituality.
It is a dimension of being that enlarges itself by an inward withdrawal of
the erroneous movement of consciousness in the direction of things which
are really not. Why do you say that things are not? You may ask me, “I
see the world outside, there is a thick wall in front of me, how can it be
said to be non-existent?” Nobody says that it is not there. The world
is there, as everything that is seen in dream is inside the mind of the dreamer,
but the ‘is’-ness of the object, the wall in the front, or the
world external, is to be taken in its proper position. The world exists,
but does not exist outside consciousness. The idea that the world of dream
is external to the perceiving consciousness is the cause of the dream world
being a harassment. The world is very much there, but it is not outside consciousness.
Why should it not be outside consciousness? Because, we have already decided
that consciousness cannot be divided into the subject and object, it cannot
be partitioned into bits here and there. It is an inclusive being and, therefore,
even that which consciousness perceives, knows, is included in consciousness
only. Thus, our mind pursuing sense-objects in any way, whatsoever, is a
blunder. This blunder is to be taken care of. And austerity, spiritually
speaking, Tapas, is the restraint of consciousness from erroneous
movements in emerging circles of outward externality, space and time, and
the centring of it in itself, which is the Atman, and which is Brahman.
There is neither an outside nor an inside, but an everywhere-ness, minus
the limitations of space and time. Such is the grand objective we are in
search of. And you need not ask me where it is, because you would have seen
clearly before your mental vision where it is. You need not also ask me,
how it is possible. This also will be clear to you, of its own accord, when
you know where it is. When it is clear to you as to where it is, you would
also know where you are in this context. And when you know where you are
in this relation to yourself, you would know how to contact it, also; because
the basic question has first to be answered—what it is. And if this
is clear, everything connected with it also becomes clear. Hence, caution
is to be exercised even in our pious enthusiasm to pursue the path of God.
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