Sessions with Ashram Residents

by Swami Krishnananda

Session 32: Renunciation and the Fulfilment of Desires

If you are one of the inhabitants of the world, living by its bounties and depending on its produce, how will you renounce the world? If the mind of the renouncer expands to such an extent that it encompasses all the values of the world—if your thoughts are so rich that they include all the wealth of the whole world—then your renunciation of the whole world becomes a real renunciation. The world is nothing but a sense of values. It is not that you renounce the stones or the mountains or the trees, etc. The values that you attach to any particular thing is the world for you. If you have no value at all for anything, you have renounced it.

If a gold chain is lying on the road and a cow is eating grass nearby, will it eat the gold chain? It will not even care that it is there. But for a human being, it will be more important than the grass. So the meaning of a thing is in the value of it. Valueless things need not be renounced, and things which have great value cannot be renounced. You do not want to renounce a valuable thing. Suppose a person sees a wristwatch lying on the road. It is a petty thing, but still there is a desire to pick it up: “Let me have it. Why not?” That is, the mind of the person has not overcome the limitations of seeing value in a watch. You can exist without a watch. It is not necessary at all. There is no need of knowing what time it is. Why are you wanting to know what the time is? Throw away all the watches, and still you will be happy, with no problems. Only sunlight is the timekeeper. But we get into little petty things—transistor radios, and so on.

Renunciation is done by the mind. If you move from one place to another place, it does not become renunciation. The dharma that Bhagavan Sri Krishna speaks of is the accommodation of oneself to a sense of value that you see in the world. Are you a highly valuable person? Close your eyes and ask yourself: “Am I a valuable person?” This question cannot be answered. You will be terrified because you are not sure that you have got any value. Why should you not be sure that you have some value? The value that is seen in you should be greater than the value you see in anything outside: “I have such a value in me that I don't want anything else. I can just exist.” Such a person is called a great man. He is greater than other people. That is, he has a value higher than the value of all other people. What that value is, it is up to each person to decide.

When you sit in your own room, really feel: “I am a very powerful person.” Power means not the elephant's strength. “I have got a mental strength which can summon anything that I want because I keep my mind in contact with all the things in the world, with all the quarters of heaven. I am honestly meditating on everything, which is everywhere. The Chhandogya Upanishads says to meditate that you are everything: “I am the sun and the moon, and the quarters of heaven, etc. The gold and silver, and all the fourteen worlds, Indra, Brihaspati, Narayana and Nara, everybody, they are all coming, sitting in front of me and wanting me. Narayana wants me, Nara wants me, Indra wants me, Prajapati wants me.” Do not only chant it; your heart should say that: “Yes, really I am a valuable person. They all want me. Brihaspati is calling me. Virat, Hiranyagarbha, Ishvara, Brahma, they are all calling me. I am a powerful person. I want nothing else. If I call them, they will come.” Your heart should melt and say this: “I have got everything, the best of things. Anything that I want will come to me. Everything will come to me. My heart is throbbing with feeling for these things. They are touching me. There is no distance of even one inch between me and the great values that I see in all these substances. Space is touching me, time is touching me, the sun is touching me, all the fourteen worlds are touching me. Brahma, Vishnu, Siva are touching me. What more do I want?”

It is not a joke. It is not uttering a mantra. You are feeling it. It is a fact; they are touching you. Brahma is not sitting in a far-off place. The creative activity taking place in the whole universe is Brahma, the sustaining activity taking place everywhere is Vishnu, and the transforming activity taking place everywhere, inside your body also, is Rudra. So Brahma, Vishnu and Siva are working inside you. The three states of waking, dreaming and sleeping—waking is Virat, dreaming is Hiranyagarbha, sleeping is Prajna—that is Ishvara, and Kutastha Atman is Brahman.

Suresvaracharya in his Pranava Vartika says that since the waking condition of your personality is part of the Virat, what prevents you from feeling unity with that Virat? The whole universe is called Virat, and you are inside that. So why don't you feel unity with it? You must cut off the difference between you and Virat. Similarly, consider the dreaming experience as Hiranyagarbha, Prajna, the sleeping condition as Ishvara, and the shining consciousness as Brahmanishta. All Virat, Hiranyagarbha, Ishvara, Brahman are inside only, and you should deeply think it. The law is, as you think, so you are. Whatever you think you are, that you really are. Great strength comes. Then you will not go for petty things. You will not talk to anybody. You will keep quiet and be happy inside. Everybody will do namaskarto you.

Think like this always, and touch your heart: “I am very blessed. Some transformation is taking place. Every day I am meditating. What a great thing! I am sinking into the spirit of deep meditation of union with the Absolute Being. The Viratsvarupa, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, Rudra—with all of them I am in unity. All the gods—Ganesha, Durga, Lakshmi, Saraswati, Surya, Skanda, all are dancing in front of me. I am one with them. I cannot stand outside them, and they cannot stand outside me. The universe is one whole, one whole. I am very happy! I am feeling wonderful, throbbing with joy. Strength is coming. I don't want anything. If I want it, I will get it; everything will come.” Sometimes saints go on saying something as if they are crazy people, but they are not crazy. They are really wonderful people.

So the waking consciousness is Virat, the dreaming consciousness is Hiranyagarbha, the sleeping consciousness is Prajna, and that which is hidden inside, that is one with the Eternal Being. You are carrying eternity with you wherever you go, like a treasure chest. Everything will come. Swami Sivanandaji, who brought nothing with him, stayed in Swargashram eating only dry chapatti. How did he become so powerful? Was it due to money? He had no money. He had no friends. He had no disciples. What made him great? It is this kind of tapasya.

Swami Sivanandaji used to sometimes tell us, in a jocular mood, “Do you know what I am thinking? In the early morning, what am I thinking? When the sweeper comes, what do I think? Sahasraśīrṣā puruṣaḥ sahasrākśaḥ sahasrapāt (P.S. 1): One of the heads of the Purusha is coming. When the sweeper comes, I take a flower and put it on his head. He is not a sweeper, he is one of the heads of the Virat. Sarvataḥpāṇipādaṁ tat sarvato'kṣiśiromukham (B.G. 13.13). Everyone's head is His head. I am thinking like that. This is my sadhana. Then I take a bath.”

In those days Swamiji was taking a bath in the Ganga. A very charitable person he was, even in his heart. “I take the first dip in the Ganga for the salvation of all those people who have departed from this world. The second dip is for the salvation of all the people who are going to be born into this world. The third dip is for the salvation of this particular soul. So I take three dips,” he would say.

Only such a person who doesn't want to keep anything for himself can be charitable. “Give! Give, and it shall be given back to you pressed, filled and overflowing.” Very interesting. It is wonderful to hear all these things. If you give one kilogram of charity, a million kilograms will come to you. Swamiji was one person of that type. Give, give, give, give, give, give, give, give!

Swamiji's secretary went to Swamiji and said, “Swamiji, we have no money. The prasada that you give in the satsanga may be reduced a little bit. We cannot afford to give prasada like that.” Swamiji told the kitchen, “Tomorrow, double you bring.” And his calculation was not wrong. If somebody eats here freely for one month without doing anything in recompense for it, another person comes who stays here for only five minutes and eats nothing, and gives a large donation. That is also wonderful. We are unable to see things properly. Our eyes are blinded and very narrow. How much God gives!

It is not easy to understand Swami Sivananda. It is also not easy to understand the Bhagavadgita. Both are very difficult. Swami Sivananda was just like Bhagavan Sri Krishna. He would disapprove of whatever we did. If Yudhisthira said something, Krishna did not like it, and if he did not do anything, that also Krishna did not like. If we went with hardly any clothing, Swamiji would get angry. “Your vairagya is foolish. Just because you don't wear clothes you are thinking that you are having vairagya. Put on clothes!” So then we would put on a blanket, and Swamiji would say, “This man is attached to his blanket. He is always clinging to that blanket.” [Laughter] If we didn't wear clothes it is foolish vairagya; if we put on something, we are attached. Now what to do? He would say, “There is tamas in your body, and so you must do hard work, hard work, hard work.” And if a person was only working, working, working, he would say, “This man is attached to work so much. No japa, meditation, nothing. Hey, do some prayer also! Do japa. Only working, working, working, working.”

There were two swamis here who did very hard work. Practically they are the founders. They did so much work that they founded the Ashram itself. Some swami was putting postage stamps, a very sincere man. When he died, Swamiji asked me, “Where is this man now? He is putting stamps somewhere.” Swamiji didn't appreciate the work that he was doing. “After death also he is putting stamps,” he said. If someone supervised house building, he would say, “In the next birth he will become a brick.” Everything he would criticise. That is, he wanted a blend, not extreme things. If you put stamps, you will become a stamp. If you supervise the building of a house, you will become a brick. Then what is to be done? Everything must be blended together.

This is what Bhagavan Sri Krishna is saying in the Bhagavadgita. Sometimes he says, “You do work.” Sometimes he says, “I am doing everything.” What is this contradiction? “I have already done the work,” Sri Krishna says. “Whatever you want to do, I have already done it.” Everything is a contradiction. But it is not a contradiction; it is the Cosmic Being. The Cosmic Being is speaking from the cosmic point of view, with cosmic inclusiveness. Therefore, anyone who reads the Bhagavadgita from a literal point of view cannot understand it. You must raise your spirit to that status.

This is a kind of satsanga so that we may cleanse our hearts a little bit. If there are some troubles inside the heart, they must be removed. You should not keep them. You must say, “I have got some problem inside.” You won't say that because people will think you are a fool, but there is no need to think that way. That thing inside must be removed. You might have brought some family problem from your house and are worrying about it just now. That must be removed. There are prejudices, passions, grievances. “I wanted something, and I am not getting it. If I had gotten it, it would have been good, but I am not getting it.” If you think like that, you must get it. If you want something which is worrying you, and you cannot sit without it, you must be given it in a homeopathic dose, not in an allopathic dose. An allopathic dose means you are actually giving it, but a homeopathic dose means it looks as if you are giving it, but you are not actually giving it. Like that you must fulfil desires. Desires should be fulfilled in a homeopathic manner, not in an allopathic way. Allopathic means you are actually giving it, and that should not be done because then danger will come. It requires great guidance by a good Guru, a person who understands your problems.

There are people who don't talk. Morose they sit because they have got some problem. You must find out what their problem is. “I wanted something I could not get. I have lost everything, and have come here.” Then you must find out some way for him to see that his harassment goes from the heart.

There are strong attachments and desires which could not be fulfilled. They pursue you wherever you go. It requires guidance. Who is the guide? We have lost the physical guide. The only guide was Swami Sivanandaji Maharaj, so we feel as if we have physically lost our father. We cannot consider ourselves fit to even lift his shoes, so far away from him we are. We have lost him, but his grace will illumine us from within if we really want him.

Many people have been saved from tragedies just by remembering his name. Some people wanted to go to Badrinath. “Don't go today. Go tomorrow,” Swamiji said, but he wouldn't tell the reason. What happened was that on that particular day the bus they would have taken was crushed by a falling tree.

An ashramite: Swamiji, these great ones, they speak very briefly.

Swamiji: They will not give a long commentary. Swami Sivanandaji did not like commentaries. Only a little bit he would tell, and we had to understand from that. It is like Panini's sutras. The whole world is there, but he tells it in one sutra.